How To Craft a Personal Ad That Truly Expresses Who You Are

Most people surf through tens if not hundreds of profiles every time they search a dating site. If you sound like everyone else, you are going to be treated like everyone else.

Stop the boredom!
There are tons of articles about writing the perfect profile on sites like Yahoo Personals,, and, —and each one is slanted toward the profiles of the particular dating service. Online dating expert Evan Mark Katz offers advice and sample profile makeovers in his e-newsletter. Many, many books exist on the subject if you want to get obsessive about it.
However, these ten tips should get you started down the right path:

  • Know your audience, and speak to them. Search for the profiles of your target audience, and match your language to theirs. The subtle mimicking of words and ideas will attract the people who think the way you like.
  • Understand the site you are using. For example, in adult dating networks like, you can get explicitly sexual and kinky in your text (although not as much so in your photos) without violating the tTerms of sService. At, however, you’ll find a more general audience, some of whom are likely to flag you for “offensive material” if you get too raunchy, ensuring that your profile never gets found. (Know thy screeners, as well as thy audience!
  • Show, don’t tell. Use your photos to paint the picture of a dog-loving, REI-shopping, adventurous world traveler. Instead of just putting in the stock head shots, post the picture of you standing on the Great Wall of China with your friends, or rolling in the mud with your Great great Dane. But don’t PhotoShop yourself onto a backdrop. One day, someone will ask you about that trip, and making up a good story can be tricky, especially if you’ve attracted a true world traveler with your pictures.
  • Stop with the clichés! Who cares if you are “fun- loving,” “funny” and “physically fit?” Blah. Everyone says that. Try instead…”: “My trainer has become one of my best friends—not only do we work out together 3x a week, but we visit the Saxon Pub at least once a month to see our favorite local guitarist hit some new riffs.” See… . . . fun and fit in the same sentence.
  • Be funny instead of saying you are funny. Yes, we know that men don’t tend to list “sense of humor” as high on their must-have lists as women do, but if you can elicit a laugh, you might catch the attention of someone who shares your quirky outlook on life. Most people will contact someone a person who  they feel a connection with, or a person who makes them feel happy. This may not apply to the brooding artists of the world, but then again, your dark- side- of- the- moon commentary might just attract the neighbor who secretly listens to you practicing your guitar on the back step at night. You just never know.
  • Yes, sex sells… . . . but again, know your audience. If you really are trying to find a quality connection, leave the sex for later. Otherwise,  you’re likely to be overwhelmed with come-ons from men you have no interest in, and you could miss a good one in the flood.  \When you meet – —ya either got it or ya don’t. Leave it under wraps till until you actually want to act on it. If you are on a site where hookups are the primary focus, then sex away, and revel in the power of free speech.

Find the rest of this lesson and thousands more sexier sex tips in:

Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn

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