Tag Archives: texting

How to Compose Erotic Email

While English teachers groan and bemoan the supposedly “lost art” of letter writing, email has helped millions of women discover their inner Anaïs Nins and Pat Califias. (Hey, they didn’t call it “hotmail” for nothing.) It’s true that typing and sending an email takes less time than writing by hand and sealing and stamping envelopes. But as anyone who has ever tried to express love, longing, and lust with mere words can tell you, the composition process is just as painful as ever.

It’s worth it though. And you don’t have to be a professional writer or award-winning author to tingle your lover’s toes. These tips will have you crafting heart-pounding, blood-roaring prose so hot, your English teacher will forget that you didn’t write it out by hand.

  • Present tense works especially well, as it puts your lover immediately into the story: I wrap my arms around you, drawing you closer to me with each breath. Your pulse pounds in your throat; I can feel your heartbeat against my breasts.
  • Weave in details from your shared history to add authenticity and show your lover that you cherish the memories. For example, mention music from an artist you’ve seen in concert, set the scene in a familiar location, or include a favorite toy
  • Fantasy is fair game. If you can imagine it, you can write it—even if your body can’t do it. Email erotica can involve exotic destinations, improbable positions, impossible feats of stamina and stimulations, winged angel lovers from space
  • Even if you’re just dashing off a quickie to let your lover know you’re hot for them, try to engage the senses. Involve smells, tastes, textures, sounds, what things look like, how you feel, how you respond. Even porn stories don’t just list a series of actions (he touched, she sucked, he penetrated, they came). What sets erotic email apart from erotic short stories is that it’s all about your lover(s) and you, which means it’s a perfect vehicle for showing your appreciation for their talents, showing things you’d like to do, and giving them a window into your mind if you’ve been in a rut of work–kids–chores–sleep–repeat for a while.

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How To Have Cybersex

The old joke about typing one-handed doesn’t cover the half of it. Entire books have been written on this subject, and although many of the other lessons in this book touch on important aspects of cybersex, in this lesson, the focus is on the mechanics of it all.

  • Play with language. I don’t care if you’re on webcam and have 3D avatars to boot—language is the foundation of cybersex, and language is the bridge between your minds, hearts, and bodies. Use words that shock and awaken; use imagery drawn from the erotic, the pornographic, and the innocuous. Weaving literary metaphor with raunchy sex talk keeps you both engaged.
  • Don’t disappear halfway through. You wouldn’t in real life, and you shouldn’t in cybersex. If you think you will be interrupted, stick with flirting and save the cybersex for another day.
  • Select a handle you can stand to read and hear on a regular basis in a sexual context. “HotMama” will serve you better than “JakesMom,” for example.
  • Don’t be self-conscious or worried about your spelling or writing. As long as you say what you’re imagining, you’ll do fine.
  • Learn the power of “Mmmm”—a cybersex essential. Use it when you can’t think of anything to say but it’s your turn to type, when your lover says something so arousing you need to stop typing for a moment but need to show you’re still there, and when the other is in the middle of writing an elaborate setup and needs a response but not help from you.

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Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn

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How to Get Your Lovers to Send You Hot Text Messages, Even If They Don’t Want to at First

It’s almost incomprehensible, but did you know that many people aren’t interested in hot texting?

Shocking, I know.

But if you are at all word oriented, your lover needs to make an effort to connect with you in this way. No ifs, ands, or buts. It’s amazing, what those 160 characters can do. They can say “I’m thinking of you” or “I love you” or “I want to bury myself between your thighs and not come up until you’ve climaxed six times.” Sometimes all that in a single message.

These are some of the ways I’ve had success in teaching lovers to text me:

  • Ask them to text you sometimes, and explain how much you appreciate their effort and thoughtfulness. Remind them it doesn’t have to be Nobel-winning poetry, just an honest note.
  • Send them hot texts telling them what you want to do with them next time you see them, and then following through, so they make the connection between hot text—foreplay—lovemaking.
  • Point out that song lyrics that have meaning for you make wonderful text messages.
  • Show them a way they can text your phone from a web interface. Google and Yahoo both make applications that let you send a message to almost any phone, as do the phone companies and texting websites.Remind them that pictures are worth a thousand words, so even if a picture message costs more to send, it’s also worth 6.25 text messages.
  • Short words work really well in text. Think of all the wonderful four-letter nouns and verbs the two of you can share. Unlike email, there’s no big blank page daring you to fill it up.

Find the rest of this lesson and thousands more sexier sex tips in:

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Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn

Recent Tips:

How to Feel Closer When You’re Apart

Long-distance or traveling lovers have so many ways to stay in touch these days. This is a not an exhaustive list by any means, but it should be enough to get you started.

  • Skype: Skype is free and connects you through voice, text, and webcam.
  • Microblogging: Services like Twitter and Jaiku provide a fun way for couples and their friends to keep in touch. It’s a simple idea: Through the web, IM, or a cell phone, you send a short message to a central address.
  • Sharing The Music: SimplifyMedia lets you and your lover listen to each other’s music libraries over the Internet, even the copyright-protected files, as long as you both log in with the same user name. You can invite up to thirty friends to share libraries, so it works for polyamorous groups as well as couples.
  • Instant Messaging: Once you get into the groove, you might be able to IM alongside any other work or school project you’ve got going. It might seem awkward at first, but for many people (including me), it soon becomes so natural to talk with a lover while working that it becomes harder to work without IM going than with the connection open.
  • Building A Virtual Home: Second Life, Red Light Center, Jewel of Indra—pick an environment that appeals to you and build yourself a nest.

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Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn

How to Reveal Yourself (and How to Know When It’s Time)

Many people reach a point in an online relationship when they realize they want to reveal themselves utterly to another person.

It’s hard to say when the “right time” is. As with most relationships, you’ll need to make your decisions based on what works for the two of you and what you feel is right.

Here are some general tips for when to exchange full names:

  • You start talking about meeting in person and are already researching airfares and hotels.
  • You are talking frankly about your job, your life, your kids, your friends, and your hobbies, and only then realize that you’ve been perfectly comfortable doing so all along.
  • You realize you feel closer to this person than almost anyone else in your life, and you would like to hear them whisper your name rather than your handle.

Once you exchange names, search for each other like crazy, digging up old high school photos or blog posts or book reviews you posted to Amazon ten years ago. This is where you reveal yourself as a person with a past—and perhaps as a person with some ’splainin’ to do. (It’s a good idea to Google yourself beforehand so you know what your lover is going to see.)

  • Find the rest of this lesson and thousands more sexier sex tips in:

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Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn

How to Seduce Someone in 160 Characters or Less

Text messages are the best thing for couples since the invention of the cell phone. It doesn’t matter if you’re freshly dating or if you’ve been together for years—a text is the perfect compromise between flirting and productivity.

Ten Tips for Titillating Text:

  • Mix it up. Be romantic, funny, erotic, matter-of-fact and pornographic by turns.
  • Use abbreviations sparingly, but use them when you need them.• In the beginning of a new hetero relationship, the woman is usually the one to set the tone (for example: family, flirty, or filthy.)• Sometimes it’s hotter to use the longer word rather than the shorter one.
  • Triple-check the recipient’s address before you press Send.
  • It’s better to craft original text than paste canned phrases from a list. But it’s okay to quote song lyrics, books, movies, and anything else that holds meaning for the two of you.
  • Women are often more sexually explicit in text messages than they are out loud. At first.
  • You can send text messages to your lover’s phone from your computer at sites like http://www.txt2day.com and http://tools.google.com/firefox/sendtophone/index.html.
  • You know the relationship is going well if the two of you start developing an SMS shorthand all your own.
  • If texting becomes part of the foundation of your relationship, invest in a phone with a qwerty keyboard.

  • Find the rest of this lesson and thousands more sexier sex tips in:

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Sexier Sex

by Regina Lynn